


Think I'll Let Her In Before I Begin

by mcgarrygirl78



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-20
Updated: 2011-10-20
Packaged: 2017-10-24 19:35:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/267087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcgarrygirl78/pseuds/mcgarrygirl78
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He wanted the happy ending that was as clichéd as the flowers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Think I'll Let Her In Before I Begin

**Author's Note:**

> I love the way this pairing talks to each other in my head. This story is based on a comment fic where took_skye asked for ‘Gideon-flowers’. The title is from the Steve Perry’s Foolish Heart, my favorite song.

"Jason Gideon." he answered his ringing desk phone.

"The flowers are absolutely beautiful."

"Not as beautiful as the look on your face when you saw them, I'm sure."

"What kind of flowers are they, Jason?" Nora asked.

"They're pink camellias. They symbolize that the sender is longing for the recipient."

"I hope you know that the feeling is mutual."

Jason wanted to think so but he also thought it best not to think too much about it. He never meant to fall for Nora. He never meant to fall so hard. The BAU went to New York on another case; they went to lots of cities and met lots of police officers. Nora was more than that.

He saw her as a woman first, even when they shook hands for the first time at that crime scene. She respected what they did, listened, observed, and learned. She was also a damn fine cop…empathetic, smart, street-wise, and badass. There were a million and one things to adore about Nora Bennett and Jason was getting to know them one by one.

"I went through a dozen flowers and their meanings before deciding what to send."

“I didn’t have you pegged as the flowers type. I know you can be very romantic but I didn’t see this coming. That’s not to say that I don’t like it."

"Flowers aren’t lacking in beauty but are full of cliché.” Jason replied. “I wanted to send something beautiful but also significant to my feelings. I thought about Ambrosia, which represent reciprocated love. That was a bit heavy handed though. I didn’t want to scare you off. So I changed to Hibiscus, which means delicate beauty. They just didn’t fit my feeling.

"Larkspur means beautiful spirit, which you definitely have, but they weren’t awe-inspiring in their appearance. It was almost Dahlias, which mean elegance and were perfect, but I accidentally scrolled up and saw the Camellias. I knew they were for you as soon as I saw them. Their color reminded me of that nightgown of yours that I admire so much."

"Admire?" Nora laughed some. "Is that what we're calling it now? I left the gown under your pillow before I came back to Manhattan."

"I know. It made me happy when I found it under there. I…nevermind."

"Tell me." Nora said. “Tell me everything, Jason.”

She just wanted Jason to talk to her. If he was talking sexy that was even better. But Nora didn’t care if he wanted to read Goethe, Shakespeare, Dr. Seuss, or the _New York Times_. She loved convincing him to tell a story of growing up in Chicago or an adventure he might have gone on with his young son. She wanted to lie in his arms and listen to him spout out adjectives to describe her.

He would start in English, then maybe a little French, and finally Latin. No one ever made Latin as sexy as Jason Gideon. She just wanted to hear his voice. The only experience more powerful than Jason’s words was his body. His words stole her heart and his body joined their souls. Nora didn’t care if that was a giant cliché; it was how she felt.

"I'm glad you liked the flowers." Jason cleared his throat and changed the subject. The woman had him completely smitten. "I wish I could've seen your face."

"Shall I send you a picture?"

"Something dirty just went through my mind." Jason replied laughing.

"I'm at work, Agent Gideon, but I'll send a nice one later."

"I can hardly wait."

"Well, today is a bit insane here." Nora replied. "I'm sure you're busy too."

"I’m always busy but that doesn’t stop me from missing you, Nora."

"I'm not that far away. Even if it sometimes feels like a million miles, I know it isn’t really."

"You're not here either." Jason sighed. He didn’t want to be pushy, or clingy, no matter how he felt. Jason was almost sure she felt the same way. So many things had been implied but nothing said outright. This was new for the both of them and they weren't exactly sure how far and deep to go. At least he knew he wasn’t. Jason didn’t know what Nora was thinking because he was too petrified to ask. Petrified; that was new for him as well. "But I'll see you soon?"

"Yes you will, and I'll call you when I get off tonight. Thanks again for the flowers."

"I'm crazy about you, Nora. I just wanted to send something to show you that."

"I feel the same. Goodbye, Jason."

"Goodbye."

He hung up the phone, leaning back in his chair. _I feel the same_. No, it wasn’t _I love you too_ but Jason hadn't said I love you. He said he was crazy about her and she said that she felt the same. It was the same thing on a different level.

They weren't ready for the big words yet. Jason was so damaged, and he knew Nora had been hurt before. Sometimes he was afraid he was just going to do that all over again. The idea of ever seeing that effervescent smile fade made his stomach turn. She was magical to him; full of wonder and amazement. She was an enigma but a good one.

She wasn’t an insane Unsub or a chess match he could conquer without thinking too hard. Nora Bennett was a challenge. She took Jason somewhere he never thought he’d be again. The confusion made him feel wonderful instead of awful. He didn’t even let himself think about how much he felt awful until he wasn’t feeling it anymore.

So it was probably best not to think about how this might progress and eventually end. It always ended. He lost the things that he loved…it was Jason’s lot in life. He didn’t want to lose Nora. He wanted the happy ending that was as clichéd as the flowers.

Taking his cell phone from his hip, Jason looked at it for a few minutes. He knew what he had to do; what he wanted to do. It was time because there wouldn’t always be time. If there was one thing he knew well, it was losing things. He couldn’t bear the thought of losing her without her ever knowing. He began to type out the W.E. Henley quote.

‘ _Open your heart and take us in—love, love and me_.’ –Jason

He put the cell phone down and walked out of the room. He could hardly admit to himself that he was afraid of what the response would be. Distance would be best for now; no doubt she would respond by the time he came back to it. It was done and couldn’t be taken back. Jason felt elated and nauseous all in the same breath and it was a magnificent feeling.

***


End file.
